weddings + changes

H E L L O   A G A I N

I am back from vacation and, well folks, we did it. We got my brother all hitched up to Brynna and they're the cutest ever! Our trip to South Dakota for their wedding had it's ups and downs, with Chancy getting sick three days before the wedding, and all the emotions of weddings and goodbyes, but I will always look back on it fondly. The beautiful sunsets. All the hugs and "I love you"s. The drives with my SD girls. 

The day before the wedding is when it all started to become real - my brother was getting married! That morning we met at the church, and the chaos began. The flowers were getting done, we were setting up the reception, we ran out of stars for the tables and people were scrambling to make more, wrapping the tables in paper, and you know, all the wedding things! And later that day, Natasha came!! I am so happy that she made that four hour drive (ALONE!) to come see me!! Even if she did spend most her time just watching me run around, and watching rehearsal and all that jazz. And the next thing we knew it was wedding day!

(Still don't have any pictures with Chancy or Brynna because the photographer took those)

Can you believe that it wasn't even that long ago that I didn't even know these girls and now they're like sisters (and one IS my sister!)!? It still blows me away how amazing God is. He brought these girls into my life right when I needed them, and it turns out that they needed me too. And it was so hard to leave them. We cried and hugged and cried and hugged and cried and hugged some more. 

But boy does it feel good to be home now! You should have heard us squealing when we got the first glimpse of mountains on the way home, like AHHHH!!! 

And now that we're home - summer has hit the PNW (finally) and it hit HARD (100* F!?) annndddd our house sold. *nods* yes, you read that right. After 6.5 years in this house, we are moving! It's crazy because back when I first started this blog we moved into this house. Back then I didn't even know Natasha. Felicity wasn't even married. So much has happened in the years in this house. So much has changed. But I'm excited to move on to the farmhouse in "the flats"! This is a new adventure, and I can't wait to get started! 

Another change in life, is Liberty has a boyfriend (LIKE WHAT?). And before you ask - I am still single as single can be, lol. It's not at all what I had wanted for my life, but I am learning to trust that God knows what He's doing. (trying my best)

WHAT ARE SOME CHANGES HAPPENING IN YOUR LIFE?

SHOULD I DOCUMENT THE MOVE ECT AND SHARE IT HERE??

it's all an adventure that comes with a breathtaking view

 

{a life update}

^ Silver Star. 04.07.2022 ^

  Wow, guys, life is about to get crazy, and I'm excited to be blogging again, so I can take you all with me on this adventure. The adventure of having The Lady B as my SISTER. That's right guys. My darling brother proposed to Brynna and she said yes!! (big shock. lol. jk. we all saw this coming) There is literally nobody else I would want to have as my sister-in-law. Brynna felt like a sister before her and Chancy ever became a thing. And now she's going to marry my brother and move here, and she'll be my sister forever and ever. I am over the moon over this. 

  The week that she was here was so fun. I loved having her near and I loved watching her and Chancy be a couple (behind my blush. I don't know why I blush so easily over them. Something to do with the fact that he's my brother, I guess) We went hiking up "our mountain", and even though the snow drifts freaked me out, I had such a good time. I love being up there. Sometimes I'd almost rather not even hike. Just sit there, look at the view, breathe in mountain air and shout, "Woohoo Mountain Dew!!" on top of my lungs. 

  Oh, and I'm not sure if y'all remember or not, but I played a part in bringing Chancy and Brynna together. Well, I also picked the proposal location *laughs* I'm just over here being their matchmaker xP It's super fun, if I'm honest. I love them both so much and will probably cry an awful lot at the wedding. 

  My family is one of those super weird close families, and we knew Chancy bought the ring, and we even knew exactly when and where he was going to propose. When he showed us the ring that he picked out all on his own, without Brynna even knowing, I nearly cried. Guys. My baby brother is getting married. 

{sneak peak at the engagement pictures. pssttt. the engagement actually happened at this location}

   As you can tell, I am very happy about this joyous event in our lives. But I'd be lying if I said that joy was the only emotion I've been having. And I think that's normal. This is such a huge change. A wonderful change, yes. But even wonderful changes can be hard. I always thought I'd be married by seventeen. Always thought I would've started a family by now. And here I am, twenty-two, and I've never even been asked out. Nothing has happened in that regard. No romance whatsoever has happened in my life. And now I'm watching my brother fall in love with my friend. And though I love it, it also hurts. That's okay, isn't it? These feelings are normal, right?

  Someday it'll be my turn... right?

  Spring is trying it's best to come to the PNW, but guys, we've woken up to snow three times this week, and I am just ready for summer now, thanks. I took the above picture on a very lovely spring day, before we were hit with all this snow and rain. But hey, that's spring for ya. Snow, rain, sunshine, all in the same day. xP But I guess time will start to fly now, and the next thing we know it'll be summer and my baby bro will be a married man. 

  Now that Brynna has gone back home, I am hoping to pick up my reading again. So far this year I am doing great towards my reading goal. I'm excited about that. Currently I am reading Dreams of Savannah by Roseanna M White, but I haven't picked it up in so long. I am also reading through A Bundle Of Letter to Busy Girls, for the third time, lol. My nonfiction for the year. I'm not really a nonfiction reader, but I love that one.

Recently read:

Wonderland Creek by Lynn Austin (4 Stars)

Finding Lady Enderly by Joanna Davidson Politano (5 Stars)

All Manner of Things by Susie Finkbeiner (4.5 Stars)

The Librarian of Boone's Hollow by Kim Vogel Sawyer (2.5 Stars)

A Midnight Dance by Joanna Davidson Politano (5 STARS. THIS BOOK IS AMAZING)

Recently watched:

Magnum PI (we're on season 7)

Spiderman No Way Home (ahhhh this movie)

Recently listened:

Birthday Cake by Dylan Conrique 

Take Her Off Your Hands by Midland 

Miami, My Amy by Keith Whitley 

Give Me His Last Chance by Lionel Cartwright

Wyoming by Skip Ewing

Love Me as I Am by for king + country

Made Up Story by Andi

South Dakota || 2021

All I can say is. What a time.



I've had a rough summer. I lost someone very dear to me. I've been dealing with grief. And then it hit how lonely I was. Not just "I want a boyfriend" kind of lonely. But also "am I even loveable?" kind of lonely.
And then for no reason at all it seemed like, I decided to reconsider my decision to not go to my cousins wedding in South Dakota. I didn't even want to go there. I wanted to be at the wedding but South Dakota was so far, and I knew nobody, and so why even bother? But God opened all the doors, so He must want me to go for some reason, right? So I forced myself to go. Even though I was almost panicky at the thought.
And wow, am I glad I did.
I met some amazing people who make me feel loveable. Who make me giggle when I had thought I had forgotten how. Who welcome not only me, but my family (this means a lot to me).
Before coming here I wrote in my diary that I was afraid to go. Afraid because something in me said that after this trip nothing would be the same. And boy howdy. How could things be the same when I now have such a wonderful South Dakota fam?
And I got to see someone I hadn't seen in three years. And we bonded in ways we hadn't done in five or six years.
So many tears this weekend. So much laughter. So much LOVE.
And I haven't even touched on how much the wedding made me cry happy tears. It was truly beautiful. Cody and Shayne were so cute (another reason I cried, lol).
So yeah.




What a time.

@daminika_carol99  8.31.21

{left to right} Trina, Mikayla, Maybel, Molly, Kylie, Brynna, {me}, LaKaysha, and Emily

September 5, 2021

   I know I've been pretty quiet on here. It's been a while since I actually sat down, simply with the intentions of updating you on life. Or even just to talk about one thing that has happened in my life. About two months ago, something happened that changed my life forever. My dad asked my why I hadn't done a post about it yet, and I told him I wasn't ready. It still hurt too much. I didn't want to have to put it into words. 

  July 14th, 2021. My dear cousin, Abigail Rose, made it Home. (Liberty is better at doing posts than me, so go here if you want to read more about Abi)

  For 14 years she suffered in her earthly body, but still shining God's light with her giggles and smiles. And I still can't believe she's gone. Really and truly gone. It wasn't a shock to me when my dad woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me. Mostly I felt numb from the news. Tears didn't even come at first. I just kept seeing her smile, and hearing her giggle from that time I stuck a toy on her head and told her not to let it fall off. And I just kept thinking, "How stupid sad is this?"

  And so, I've been grieving. I worked. I went to church. I hung out with family. I even smiled. And I laughed. But life felt empty. I was crying myself to sleep more often than not. I'd go for drives and just cry to myself. My heart was breaking from the pain, and I wasn't sure how I'd get through. I was functioning, life was going on, but I wasn't living. 

  I told God I needed Him. I needed His help to get through this.

  My cousin, Cody, was getting married in South Dakota. Back when he had announced that, me and LaKaysha told him we were really sorry but we wouldn't be making it. And then Abi happened. And I felt like God wanted me to at least try to go. 

  I hate decisions. So I asked God to just open all the doors if I was meant to go, and to slam them in my face if I wasn't. Because I was way too upset to simply decide "I'm going". All the doors opened. Every single one. So. I forced myself to go. 

  Don't get me wrong - I wanted to share Cody and Shayne's day with them. But nothing in me wanted to go to South Dakota. I didn't know anyone there. I was afraid I'd end up sitting at the house where we were staying everyday but the day of the wedding. But hey, God must know what he's doing, right? 

  And, boy, does He.

  That trip to South Dakota turned out to me such a blessing!

  As I was crying my eyes out Sunday night, I kept thinking, "Why is leaving so hard? I met these people Thursday night!" How is it possible to love people so much after such a little time? Someone please explain, because I'm slightly confused. (lol)

  So many times while there I kept thinking, "So this is why God wanted me here." 

  First of all, I got to see a friend who I hadn't seen in a really long time. And we had great moments of re-connecting. That really was so nice.

  The wedding was an emotional one, but so beautiful and I enjoyed every minute of it - including the tearful goodbye. 

  And then, the people there were so welcoming! They welcomed me. They welcomed my family. After the wedding we went to a gathering and everyone there acted like they cared that I came. I thought for sure I wouldn't ever make new friends who really cared. And then I met those girls (pictured above). I thank God everyday for "forcing" me to go on that trip. It reminded me how it felt to have fun. To giggle. To have friends to do those things with. It reminded me how it felt to be loved. 

  Yes, I was afraid that after going on this trip life would never be the same again. And that scared me. But, the change was such a wonderful one! 

I will never forget my first (hopefully not, only) trip to South Dakota. 

  So. I guess the point of this post is to tell you this: Trust God. He really does have a plan. 

When They Said I Do || My Sister Got Married

The week leading up to the wedding was crazy. Okay, the month (s) leading up to the wedding was (were) crazy.

Crazy, crazy, crazy. 
And that's all I've got to say about it. *winks*

I mean. Like wow.
I don't even remember what happened. That's how crazy it was. But the week before the wedding was the craziest.
First, we had Felicity's Last Night Out, on Monday. Tuesday? don't remember. Wednesday was the day the groom flew in. Along with all the groomsmen, my aunt and uncle w/ their four kids, my Grandpa and Grandma, and a 2nd cousin - all on the same flight. (except the one random groomsman who cam from Alaska)
We went to my aunt and uncle's to see family, and I got to snuggle my twin cousins and feel whole again.
Thursday night was the Last Night Out. I know most people do one last night out for the bride, while the groomsmen do another for the groom. Well, we did do that. But Felicity and Josiah also wanted a Last Night Out (as close as possible to their actual last night single) with all their friends together. So we reserved a lost at our favorite pizza place and met there for a late supper.

I shared pictures from all this in my last post. 

Then it was the day before the wedding and we had a huge list of things to do.
First, the flowers. Load the vehicles. Go to the grange, unload the vehicles. Then the fun part - decorating.

I apparently didn't get a picture of this when it was finished.
In the end there was a stump with greenery on the left

"In Loving Memory of those who are Forever in Our Hearts"

And that night, after rehearsal dinner and rehearsal, family came over to our little house. It was crowded, but where there's love, there's room. And we sat around in the loving room, Denny played the piano and we all sang, and it was beautiful.

And then it came.

Wedding Day! 

That morning, we were late. As always. But still we got to our aunts' house, and had an amazingly relaxing morning. I had thought we'd be running around like crazy and we'd all be super stressed, but it wasn't that way at all. We slowly ate breakfast, got ready, drank coffee to help us survive, and then it was time to head to the grange.

 Love you sissy! <3333 

 Kirsten was so beautiful and she did a wonderful job as personal attendant! <3 

I can't even begin to describe the way I felt the closer it came to time to walking down that aisle. I was soooo scared. I ran down to the basement to use the bathroom one last time, and when I came back up, there was Kimberly. In line to sign the guest book. I squealed, hugged her, and went running back to the brides room to "hide". I loved that moment. <3 Even if I was too busy to even say hi to her boyfriend.

Then we were told to line up. And Kirsten waved at me, I walked towards Gordon, took his arm, and even remembered to smile. Halfway down the aisle I realized it was happening.

Then I stood up there. For 45 minutes. Tried my hardest not to cry when the songs where sung. Prayed with all my might that I wouldn't pass out.
And then little Evelyn's arm was around my leg. And I knew my little cousin (flower girl, in case you were wondering) was afraid being up there, and somehow that helped keep me from passing out. Maybe because I felt I had to be brave for Evelyn? *laughs*

And just like that my sister was married.

We walked back down the aisle. Went into the basement. I hugged Felicity.

And for the first time in months, I relaxed and actually ate. *laughs*
Being a bridesmaid is a lot of work, and the rest evening I was running around. Decorate the car. Gather people for the bouquet toss. Say goodbye. Sing them off.

I took a moment to relax (no, I was not smoking a cigar. why do you ask? *winks*) and by the time I got back in the grange, it was mostly cleaned up.
By 8:30 (pm) I was at my aunts' house, drinking tea and talking about the crazy, wonderful day.

That night, I went home.
And I slept.